I have many thoughts bombarding my already war-torn mind, so that last few nights I have retired to the trenches early. I have a handful of posts that I have started and have yet to finish, and honestly probably won't, but they were great contemplating tools. My thoughts, as of late, are rarely completed before a new idea begins, it's quite taxing. So in an effort to calm my mind I've been pondering this, consider the Following:
If only my internal combustion and timing could be harmonized with 3 hours and a local auto parts store. But, no such luck. However, I learned a valuable lesson today. When diagnosing my friends car, I immediately thought it was a specific faulty part. But convinced myself otherwise because it is a part that rarely needs replacing, so instead I replaced three other parts before finding the one that actually proved to be faulty. If I would have followed my gut in the beginning the project would have only taken 30 minutes max. But, in the processes other problems were fixed and regular tune-up type actions were done. Her car now runs smoother and more efficiently than it would have if I had just replaced the specific part.
Now that I think of this, there are several programs that function this way (missionary work). Simply put, work on bettering the system as whole not just one aspect. We have a phrase in economics that says self-reinforcing effects generate extreme outcomes. So, what this means is I need to do something in my life that will bring about personal change that in turn will generate more change, almost effortlessly. That's how an efficient economy works so I simply need to identify my personal self-reinforcing effects. To a person dealing with homosexuality in the Church, these could be; befriending your church leaders, voluntarily attending institute, contribute in church meetings, and I'm sure there are many others but I'll let you decide what is best for you. I'm not suggesting that this will make our relationship with the church any stronger, I'm simply suggesting it will make it more pleasant. If you want to be a part of the church, which I guess most BYU students do, but find it increasingly more difficult to get excited about it, this process may help you. I think it will help me, and I'll be sure to let you know how it goes.
Although, much more time consuming, this method can bring the desired results more permanently than the quick and dirty fix. It will hopefully give you more time and mental bandwidth needed to address the larger problems that find us in life, and hopefully your thoughts will become less scrambled and you will stress less about the little things.